To all you Lexiphiles

 *To write with a broken pencil is pointless.*
 *When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.*
 *A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.*
 *When the smog lifts in Los Angeles , U.C.L.A.*
 *The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.*
*The batteries were given out free of charge.*
 *A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.*
 *A will is a dead giveaway.*
*If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.*
 *With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.*
 *Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat  miner.*
 *You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.*
 *Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under.*
 *A boiled egg is hard to beat.*
 *When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.*
 *Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.*
 *Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.*
 *If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.*
 *A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.*
 *In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes.*
 *When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds*
 *The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.*
 *He had a photographic memory which was never developed.*
 *Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.*
 *When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.*
 *Acupuncture: a jab well done.